Healing: day 7 (wisdom)

(Click here to learn about the daily blog project)

My wisdom? Knowing I’m not always going to succeed at this healing thing…or be able to talk about it every day for a month.

I’ve written about this here for four years and honestly, I’m done with the laser focus on my body’s collective failures that led to the loss of our baby and permanent scarring on my heart.

If I’m going to heal, I’m going to need to build the home I live in – both physically and metaphorically – from the inside out.

And for me to do that? I can’t wake up every morning and write about my greatest loss for a month.

Maybe not wise in some eyes, but my eyes are the ones that count in my story, so just like having the wisdom to know when to end infertility treatments after 6 tries and 9 donor egg embryos, even when my doctor and others hollered “never give up!” while my heart and soul and body disintegrated?

She ready.

So no photo, and no more on this topic for a long while I hope.

Now, back to your regularly scheduled programming on The EcoFeminist.


6 thoughts on “Healing: day 7 (wisdom)

  1. I totally get you because you are loved.. Enjoy and revel in what you have, not what has failed to come to you. My heart breaks for you and this trip you have been on, but you also have a lot to enjoy so give your hubby a big kiss and smile


  2. I’m so sorry, and I totally understand, at least some of it. I lost a baby between Avery and Iris, and it took me four years before I told anyone besides Jasper and my doctor. The not-talking-about-it was how I was able to recenter and keep going. Hugs to you and Dan.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. From a slightly different angle – I never had children. Wrong marriage, tough career, lack of money – you name it. It was annoying how mothers blamed me as if I had actually decided to remain childless. It didn’t happen and then it couldn’t, and at 51 I have invested in the two and four footed instead. For a few years I became step mother to my husbands teenagers. Fun. But the one thing it did was stop the comments. And now I don’t have to talk about why I never had children. . Sometimes people have to realize its out of your hands and to stop discussing the whys. Sometimes its good to move on and live your life as it is or as its supposed to be. Not perfect, but a good life nevertheless.


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