Alrighty folks it’s in the 60s and raining here, like Mother Earth looked at the calendar and went “okay people you wanted fall, here you go!” And with that, the focus slowly turns indoors and thinking about the shorter days and longer nights that are creeping in slowly but surely. Not sure about you but I cannot WAIT to get my hoodie out!
Here’s some food for thought while I do wait for that day…
- “There’s a dark, “Picture of Dorian Gray” undercurrent to it all: Each sign of wear on your face might be taken as evidence of your failure as a person.” GREAT article in the New York Times about the women’s magazine bullshit that happens related to anti-aging. I’ve written about this multiple times (including a letter to the editor last week to Glamour magazine who claim to care about women’s health yet still advertise cigarettes, not to mention cosmetics with endocrine disruptors, carcinogens, and reproductive toxins in them), and have continually been amazed by the vast number of hypocritical female celebrities who act like they are all eco-friendly and spout off constantly about accepting yourself, then grab at the cash to work for cosmetics and fragrance companies (Julia Roberts, Helen Mirren, Nicole Kidman, Drew Barrymore, Ellen DeGeneres, Halle Berry, and the list goes on and on…). I’m so fucking sick and tired of “Anti-Aging” products and the shame that cosmetics companies try to inflict, something that is so woven into our culture that people think it’s a COMPLIMENT to tell a woman “oh you don’t look 43!” because my GAWD, what an insult if I actually look whatever they had in their mind an old hag of 43 might look like! Fuckin’ oath, as my husband would say, I don’t WANT to look like I’m 19 years old. I’ve earned these years and no way do I want to be mistaken for someone who’s just starting adulthood! As one blogger said about People Magazine’s “Most Beautiful” issue last year, “Gillian Anderson expresses how she’d like to embrace her aging face as something that doesn’t need to be fixed. Literally right next to an Olay Anti-Aging ad.” (by the way, follow this blog, these gals are kick ass, and have an unhealthy obsession with The Bachelor(ette) shows like my husband and I do, heh).
- And now that I’m done (for the next 15 minutes) yelling at magazines, time to turn my annoyance to the television, where I heard some idiot on American Ninja Warrior last night (yup, my husband and I are those doofuses who like to do that silly ass growl/yell AMERICAN NINJA WARRIOR! when we see it come on the TV, then pretend we are experts on how to get through the courses even though we both know, acutely, we could never ‘beat that wall’ if given the chance in real life) talk about his work with kids and tells them “you can do anything if you just dream big and set your mind to it!” BARF. First of all, that’s fucking bullshit and sets the stage for us all to think that all it takes in life is hard work to get what we want. All of us infertile women know that “setting our mind to it” hasn’t done shit to make our ovaries work, uteruses be both thickly lined AND receptive to embryo implantation, not to prevent our bodies from becoming ‘walking caskets’ for the embryo(s) that make it in but never make it out alive. So the Washington Post article No, honey, you can’t be anything you want to be. And that’s okay I thought was fabulous at calling this crazy-expectation-culture mess out. “While (Nobel Laureate) Kahneman acknowledges that skill is a key part of success, his work emphasizes that chance plays a predominant role. This can be a bitter pill for those who want to believe that we control our own destiny, and that, therefore, our destiny reflects something about our internal qualities, such as ability, drive, or worth. Implicit in this way of thinking is a different equation: Highly successful person = person with the right stuff. From here, it’s not a far leap to the notion that the haves have it because they are innately special, or because they worked hard and deserve it.” As a career coach, my way of putting it is, you might not be able to be that exact thing, but you can work in the vicinity of it. Arnold Schwarzenegger (I hate him, but it’s a good example) wanted to be President but could not because he wasn’t born in the US. But he became Governor of California. I loved all things sustainable, but had no talent in the scientific side of things, so instead I used my existing skills and recruited for a company in the industry, and took what I learned there to future employers’ green teams, from initiating the first annual e-cycling event at Major Global Shoe Company to helping the first tech startup get the City’s sustainability certification by bringing in an unpaid intern to partner with me on creating the program. When I wanted to get my MBA in Ecopsychology but did not have the means to spend $25K (and realized I had no intentions of becoming a wilderness therapist or similar), I got the grad school’s book list and read those instead. I may not have my MBA in it, but I have definitely learned. Oh and by the way, when I was 9, my goal was to become the first female jockey to win the Triple Crown – then I was crushed to find out I was already as tall as the jockeys, and my growth spurt hadn’t even started…
- I don’t know about you but I adore John Legend and Chrissy Teigen. Most recently I found this comment of his about how the racist #45 projects in his words and actions and thought it was too perfect not to share: “Well, [Trump’s] an entertainer, too, in a New York way. When he is criticising something, he is usually projecting. So, he calls people liars because he is a liar. He talks about the entertainment business because he rose through the entertainment business. He talks about people being corrupt, because he is corrupt. He talks about people being violent because he encourages violence. So, he’s usually projecting when he criticises someone.”
- Not many people know or talk about how two of history’s greatest female figures, Hillary Clinton and Marilyn Monroe (not usually mentioned in the same sentence), both shared the same debilitating condition: endometriosis. Chelsea Clinton spoke of how her mother struggled to have her and never tried after that because of the pain she endured, and I read a 2012 article on Fertility Authority about Monroe, who I knew had suffered multiple miscarriages (but never heard much more than that) while married to Arthur Miller, was prescribed a boatload of narcotics that kicked off her addiction to painkillers. In our society that only likes to give “real woman” status to those who have given birth – even more back then – I can only imagine what it must have felt like to not only be secretly ‘barren’ (I fucking hate that term) but to also be in the limelight 24/7 as the ultimate example of womanhood and sexuality. “In 1957 she suffered an ectopic pregnancy requiring emergency surgery. She was hounded by the press throughout…wheeled into the hospital for the ectopic surgery with a blanket over her head to protect her from the press, but could not avoid being forced to smile for them as she left.” (source) I cannot even imagine that fucked up day in August 2016 at the clinic finding out our baby was dead to have to come out into the parking lot and be surrounded by anyone beyond my husband. Fuckin hell.
- Did you know actor James Woods is a creepy fuck? Read this. Eww. (Note to the awesome Amber Tamblyn: you are kick ass. It took me 13 years to even publicly name the person who molested me.)
- Hurricanes Harvey and Irma combined have 75 deaths, and that’s fucking awful. I have to say though, does that mean our press coverage has to completely ignore the genocide-in-progress going on in Burma that has left over TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND child refugees? Or the 8.1 magnitude earthquake in Mexico that has killed 96 thus far and that our government backed out of helping, withdrawing promises of aid (from a country who’d offered us help with hurricane relief, no less) and instead sending “thoughts and prayers” instead (god I fucking hate that dumbass I’m-sending-thoughts-and-prayers-because-I’m-not-going-to-do-shit-for-you adage) and #45 outright LYING about not being able to say anything because of “bad cell phone service”? Repulsive.
- OK, so as I end this post for today, I want to share the gorgeous slideshow of photos from Cassini’s mission to Saturn, which burned up in space on Friday. I don’t know about y’all, but I broke into a bit of a sob seeing this immense undescribable beauty and the end of this amazing chapter of space exploration.