chocolate covered

after a number of months on hiatus, i took a break today to make truffles for a longtime friend who is getting married next weekend.  alongside her fancy cake there will be my ginger-spice truffles and my pink salt truffles.  for me, the chocolatier alter ego has been an interesting journey.  last year i was fully entrenched, learning and selling and creating and, yes, even making a little extra cash.  i sold on the streets, i sold in little halls, i sold in convention centers, i sold in shops, i sold online.  and i wondered, is this going to take me somewhere, is this on the side, or is this a fleeting moment in my creative life?

working with chocolate is now something i can do quickly, without a ton of thought.  it’s zen for me in some ways, the repetitive nature of it all.  stir, spread, roll, dip, sprinkle. but more than that, i like watching people take a bite for the first time.  from the ones where i stuff a fresh whole blueberry in the middle, for the juicy first bite, to the ones i give a healthy dose of cayenne for that tearjerking kick, to the unusual tastes that makes them go hmm, then mmmmm, like the lavender balsamic or lemon or whiskey nutmeg or raspberry serrano.

tonight i stirred the dark chocolate and remembered him mentioning my showing him someday how to work with the chocolate, watching it melt ever so slowly, touching it to the tip of my lip, dipping the ganache, rolling it in my hands. and i think of this wedding i’m going to – driving two hours, watching, knowing no one besides the bride, serving chocolates, snapping a few photos, and driving home.  i could use a dance partner on a day like this, someone to sit beside me on the drive, someone to squeeze my hand as i sit there with big teary eyes watching her declare her commitment to the man she loves.  i’ve known her since she was ten years old, she’s known me since i was just fifteen, two girls riding horses and dancing around the cabin laughing.  who knew years later where we would both be at this juncture.

and so i dip the chocolate, i top it with candied ginger, and i feel the cool summer breeze wafting through my kitchen at this late hour, and i wonder. and i relax.

4 thoughts on “chocolate covered

  1. but even in my relaxation, i know reality and know i don't have it in me right now to sustain the business, so this morning i made the decision to close it down. it leaves me terribly melancholy and, well, bittersweet, but i know i have to finish that chapter and start a new one. still love working with the medium, just no longer as a business.

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  2. I am heartbroken about your decision to leave the business – though I certainly understand. I struggle with that every day lately – keep going or not? Summer is such a bad time for retail, and it makes me extra indifferent to my hobby-business.

    That said, will you still let your friends buy chocolates from you??? 🙂 Yours are the best and I can't imagine never tasting one again!!

    Hugs!

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  3. hey there, yes summer makes it extra tough, and making batches of truffles for this wedding didn't give me the same zing that i was used to feeling, and then the second batch went awry due to humidity so i'll have to start over…my friend was sweet and said i didn't have to do it, but i want to do something for her special day so i'm going to try to finish this out nicely. yes there will be chocolates made in the future but not as something i'll keep in stock – i'll be joining regular society again and giving them away (so girl you and i can trade, hehe)…thanks so much for your support…i would help you sell your stuff in a heartbeat if you ever do shows here in pdx!

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