|godward’s ‘dolce far niente’|
last night there were no dreams. the slumber of red wine and a full belly after a day of taking care of myself. there are few things i need that cost money. lying here with the white sheets outlining the shape of my being and the filtered sunlight as i look out into the garden, thinking of the soft reminders of what is and always has been my ease – simplicity, pleasure, and the idea that there is not much i really need to get by.
what do i want? i want a little house. i want a garden. i want flowers. i want space to create, cook, write, be lazy. i want friends, i want love, i want connections, i want ideas. i want to look over at you and know that i’ve got no need to look further. i want to be safe yet be free to take chances. i want to wrap my heart in wildflowers and present it to you. i want to explore far off places and i want to enjoy this sanctuary we created. i want to stop dreaming and let my eyes focus.
some things i have, some things are on their way, some must be sought out.
and what else? what do YOU want? for gods sake, tell me what YOU want. .